My job is solving problems I created
My job is guessing then fixing mistakes
My job is clicking things with confidence
I’m fine just barely emotionally licensed
I completed task nobody requested originally
I came I saw I made snacks
My life is a comedy without audience
I don’t sweat I sparkle under pressure
We measured progress by slide count
I survived another meeting that email
I need coffee to survive mornings
My motivation expired like company policy
Every solution creates two new problems
Running late is my daily cardio
I came I saw I needed snacks
I need snacks and emotional support
I work here for emotional insurance